Computers Can Do in Movies
1. Word processors
never display a cursor.
2. You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences.
3. Movie characters never make typing mistakes.
4. All monitors display inch-high letters.
5. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA or some such
governmental institution, will have easy to understand graphical interfaces.
6. Those that don't have graphical interfaces will have incredibly powerful
text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands
typed in plain English.
7. Note: Command line interfaces will give you access to any information
you want by simply typing, "ACCESS THE SECRET FILES" on any
8. You can also infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing
"UPLOAD VIRUS". (See "Fortress".)
9. All computers are connected. You can access the information on the
villain's desktop computer even if it's turned off.
10. Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or the screen changes.
Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't
go faster than you can read. (Really advanced computers will also emulate
the sound of a dot-matrix printer.)
11. All computer panels operate on thousands of volts and have explosive
devices underneath their surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright
flash of light, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks and an explosion that
causes you to jump backwards.
12. People typing on a computer can safely turn it off without saving
13. A hacker is always able to break into the most sensitive computer
in the world by guessing the secret password in two tries.
14. You may bypass "PERMISSION DENIED" message by using the
"OVERRIDE" function. (See "Demolition Man".)
15. Computers only take 2 seconds to boot up instead of the average minutes
for desktop PCs and 30 minutes or more for larger systems that can run
24 hours, 365 days a year without a reset.
16. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished
in under three seconds. Movie modems usually appear to transmit data at
the speed of two gigabytes per second.
17. When the power plant/missile site/main computer overheats, all control
panels will explode shortly before the entire building will.
18. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file,
it also disappears from the screen (See "Clear and Present Danger").
19. If a disk contains encrypted files, you are automatically asked for
a password when you insert it.
20. Computers can interface with any other computer regardless of the
manufacturer or galaxy where it originated. (See "Independence Day".)
21. Computer disks will work on any computer has a floppy drive and all
software is usable on any platforms.
22. The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it will have (See
23. Note: You must be highly trained to operate high-tech computers because
the buttons have no labels except for the "SELF-DESTRUCT" button.
24. Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional
active animation, photo-realistic graphics capabilities.
25. Laptops always have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and
performance similar to a CRAY Supercomputer.
26. Whenever a character looks at a monitor, the image is so bright that
it projects itself onto their face. (See "Alien" or "2001")
27. Searches on the internet will always return what you are looking for
no matter how vague your keywords are. (See "Mission Impossible",
Tom Cruise searches with keywords like "file" and "computer"
and 3 results are returned.)